Where Is My World?

26240695_1972051379475155_4517396549697609296_o (1)I no longer recognize my world.
Up is down and down is up.
Truth is lost in a fog of lies.
What is honor? Does integrity matter?
Is kindness a failing of the weak?
So many questions unanswered.

I gained self-respect and dignity
By Choosing to be honest and kind.
I put behind shame and dishonor
By embracing what was moral and good.
In this upside-down world before me,
Do these qualities matter at all?

The disabled are the targets of mockery and
Women objects of sexual assault.
The lives of black youths are expendable,
And brown children languish in cages.
The rich stand high on their pedestals
While the poor go hungry and cold.

I no longer recognize my world.
Up is down and down is up.
Our soul’s nobility is gone.
Where is honor? Where is our integrity?
Where is our compassion for our fellow man?
So many questions unanswered.

Preparing for My First Adventure

Bear in Fall-rev-5w-web

My sleep patterns are off. I am awake all night and sleep all day. It started while Karen was in the hospital and I remember talking to her about it. I attributed it to anxiety, and I think that is the major cause although there might be other reasons. What troubles me the most is when I cannot fall to sleep until seven o’clock in the morning even when I force myself to bed before two o’clock. I lie awake “buzzing,” I don’t know how else to describe it. What that means is that I accomplish very little during the hours when I am awake because I am simply too exhausted.

What I have accomplished so far: I cleaned my porch and put everything back that was displaced by painting three months ago. I sorted out and filled three large boxes with stuff to donate and pitched the equivalent amount of assorted “stuff” into the trash. I arranged to close out my IRA account and am waiting for those funds to be deposited in my checking account and ordered an alarm system to protect the house while I am away from home. Once the alarm system is installed, there are no more excuses for not taking to the road.

I worked a few hours on my manuscript and need to do more before I leave. I have so many paintings, not all of which are worth keeping and in the process of sorting through them I ran across one that I thought could be salvaged. Lightening the water and creating more depth to the foliage in my bear painting was another small accomplishment. So much to do and so little energy! I just wish I could get back to more sane sleep patterns. Hopefully, a road trip will help to that end.

On Growing Old and Lonely

Sometimes bitterness creeps into my poetry the way a tear escapes even when you don’t want to cry. While many of my poems deal with vulnerability and pain, I usually express these with words of sadness and not bitterness.  There is nothing noble about acrimony.

(The bag lady feeding pigeons in the park is an old pastel of mine.)

Lunch Time-8h-200ppi